Words Matter |
Words Matter |
Heidi Kleine:
Welcome to a season of me stories, my friends. I'm your host, Heidi Kleine, a life and mental fitness coach. She developed the season of me framework to confront all those people pleasing, perfectionist, overthinking voices rumbling around in your head. Here on the podcast, I will share with you the tools and techniques and practices that will empower you to pursue your dream and introduce you to some amazing women who have already blazed the way. When you join us here each week, you just might hear that story that sparks your dream and gives you the courage to pursue Let's dive in. Greetings, my friends, and welcome back to a season of me stories. This is season 3 episode 4, which I am calling Life on pilgrimage. And I am excited in this episode to be introducing you to my friend, Wendy, Wendy and I met through Cary, who I introduced you to a few podcasts ago, who is the founder of Design for Joy. And Cary led a year long experience called a year of impact where she brought together women who were looking to learn how they could use their impact and influence in the world for good. And I met Wendy there. And Wendy is the founder of life on pilgrimage. She leads modern pilgrimages for women on ancient roots in Europe She's passionate about helping women grow in their identities as beloved daughters of god saved by Jesus and empowered by the Holy Spirit. Through her pilgrimages in Italy and France, she helps women step away from everyday life, draw closer to god, and hear his unique calling on their life. Wendy is also an event speaker and a retreat leader, and she's currently pursuing her masters in theological studies at Northern Seminary. We had a great conversation about our experience together and what it was like for her to have a season where she pursued her passion project, and I can't wait for you to meet her. Okay. So welcome, Wendy, to the podcast. I am super excited to be introducing you to my list and we just wanna get to know a little bit about you and about your passion projects. Wendy Anderson Schulz: Thank you. I'm so excited to be here. Yes. My passion project is leading women on modern pilgrimages along ancient roots in Europe. which does a really unique quirky thing that mostly gets people's response of what? Heidi Kleine: Yeah. So tell me a little well, first of all, tell us a little bit about you -- Yeah. -- and how you came to that being your passion project. Wendy Anderson Schulz: Yeah. So I have worked in Church Based Ministry for or I did work in Church Based Ministry for about 13 years. I left it in some frustration of just limitations of that role and being able to minister to people as specifically women in ways that I wanted to. And it is not a passion project that I, you know, spent time trying to agonize over what's next but instead felt a really clear call from god when I was traveling with my family in France in 2019. I was in a monastery that was built called Mount Saint Michel. That was the first place that I started hearing the Lord say, gather women, bring them along ancient paths. for deeper spiritual friendships with one another, for arrest, and for renewal. And so I started to do that. I took the leap and signed up a great group of women to go in the spring of 2020. Oh, no. And then we and then we hit pause for 2 years. But now we're up and going. Heidi Kleine: Wow. Yeah. So tell me a little bit about what it felt like to feel so called to something that then is taken away. Wendy Anderson Schulz: Well, I think in COVID, a lot of people experience that of just a lot of the maybe lies that we told ourselves or we tell ourselves here in the United States that we have, like, total control of our lives. We have the ability to to, you know, be people who go and get what we want and work hard for it and and all that kind of stuff that we don't always realize the limitations that can come our way. And so like everyone else, I just had to stop because I didn't there was no way to power through if the borders were closed. It would have been you know, very unsafe and unenjoyable to try to make it happen in those years. I'm a thematic girl. And so I started reading. I spent the I spent about a year reading all sorts of writings from women, from who lived cloistered lives, who lived in the places we'd be going to. And those year, year and a half at home, really the largest took to fuel me and feed me and grow me to be ready to lead better. Heidi Kleine: Okay. Yeah. So when you you mentioned that idea, right, when you first described your quirky idea Right? What was sort of the reaction of people around you? And how did you how did you come to stand in confidence that this is what you were called to do. Wendy Anderson Schulz: Yeah. 1, I have an incredible cheerleader of my husband. So there has never been a ministry thing, a entrepreneurial business I wanted to start, that he wasn't really willing to put his head in with mine and listen well, he's a very brilliant man, share ideas, strategize, and just believe in me. I definitely dealt with a lot of fear of, like, people don't know what pilgrimage is. You know? What if nobody signs up? And he said to me, so what? So I really had to play that game like so what if it fails? I'm not unloved. I won't be homeless. Right. That doesn't see me differently. Yeah. They're what? Heidi Kleine: That be that's so powerful because so many women in particular. Ask that question. What if I fail? And then that's what stops them. Yeah. So pushing a little bit on that. What what then made you not stop? Wendy Anderson Schulz: But, you know, I think sometimes our dreams and, like, our passion projects, these kinds of things, there are a lot of deep elements to it. But one not deep element is I just wanted to. I just wanted to go to France and have long dinners and drink beautiful wine and talk about faith with cool women. I just wanted to do it. And so I did it. And I think we discount fun way too often, especially in Christian circles or once you're over about the age twenty five. we discount fun. We should do things that are just fun, so we do. I love that so much. I love it. And Yeah. You know, you hear people say, you know, that with that adage that says, you know, find what you love and do that, and, you know, the money will follow, which I think is a little bit Yeah. Of a privilege perspective, but I love hearing you say that, you know, Find what you love to do and then find people who wanna do it with you, just kinda kinda what you were setting up as an as an example with that. So what would you say was the biggest obstacle well, I know what the biggest obstacle was. It was COVID. Right. But when the post COVID, right, as you started to emerge from that and we're like, okay. I'm gonna take my first pilgrimage. We actually are gonna do this. Like, what What were the things that you had to sort of overcome in your own mind to get that 1st pilgrimage underway? Wendy Anderson Schulz: That's really a great question. I had a lot of skill sets I needed to actually learn. And so just having the discipline to learn bookkeeping at a different level that I've never responsible for bookkeeping in a business before travel insurance matters, liability matters, dealing with fluctuating currency rates between the euro and and the dollar. Right. yeah, just being able to learn something and then being willing to learn the next thing. until you can start putting some pieces together. And if you're just willing to like take the learn to do the next thing, whether it's QuickBooks or it's marketing platform or or even, you know, creating a real on Instagram. If you wanna just take the risk and learn that next thing, or ask for help, which I've got really good at is asking for help to learn the next thing. It's amazing a year, a year and a half into just deciding you're willing to learn that you can turn around and say, I'm in a very different place than I was a year ago with this dream. I actually know some things. I have made some connections. I've read some books. I've gained some skills. And that's a beautiful thing, you know, to Yeah. Heidi Kleine: So I just wanna pause there for just a second. Some of my listeners will remember I did a podcast early on about reflection and about how I had created this journal as part of a mastermind years ago, And then every time that group of people got together, I pulled the same journal out. Mhmm. And it was almost full, this last trip I took with them. And so On the plane there, I read the whole thing. And it was such a powerful experience because I had to realize how many of the things I had put in that journal. Like, if you had asked me before reading it, How far have you come? I would have said, well, I would have led with here are the things I haven't done. Right? And then -- Mhmm. -- but after reading the journal, I was like, wow, I've I've done most of the things that I set out to do. And even though I'm always kind of in this place where I I'm supposed to be doing something more, I have accomplished so many of those things that I wrote down early on. And so I love that learn to do the next thing, but, also, look back and reflect on what you have learned and, like, what what is the progress and as you kind of go along that journey So I would love for my listeners just to hear, like, if if you were to pick a story out from one of how many pilgrimages have you done now at this point? Wendy Anderson Schulz: how about to complete our 4th. So when I say about to complete, so our pilgrimage process is actually a 4 month process. So you spend 3, three and a half months in preparation together with the group who'll be traveling together. Part of that is spiritual preparation, part of its practical preparation, and that time is very rich in us diving into scripture and you know, seeking the Lord's will for our pilgrimage together, then we go on pilgrimage together for a week, and we come back and we have what we call, like, a a runway home for a few weeks of implementing what we've heard from the Lord on pilgrimage. So I'm getting ready to take our 4th group to Italy Heidi Kleine: Okay. So is there just a story, maybe a story of transformation that you are comfortable sharing in this conversation from one of those trips. Yeah. Wendy Anderson Schulz: One of the things that has been surprising to me or that I wasn't on the lookout for that has happened in our pilgrimage community is gathering women who are in the process of grieving. And I think there's something about the physical movement of pilgrimage, the leaving where we live to seek out God somewhere else that speaks to some women in grief. and we had a mom come with us to on one of our French pilgrimages. And she came about 6 months after her son had taken his life. And she was so brave in being able to come She only knew one person in the group, and she came expectant and into that God would meet her there. And we watch her really authentically have conversations, authentically talk about her grief, authentically talk about just where she was at and where she was struggling and and also where she was finding the Lord. And on the last night, we have the opportunity to all share our takeaway, our next step are or what we have heard from the Lord. And she said, I came hoping to find hope again. but I found hope as well as joy in the Lord. No. Yeah. And so just watching even the trajectory in the last 18 months of her life since that journey has been such a great privilege. a great, great privilege. There's no pilgrimage trip program book that takes away that type of grief. But we have a God who is faithful to meet his children aren't where they are, and it's a beautiful thing to get to see that experienced by people. Heidi Kleine: Well, I love hearing that story, and I love how how you were able to hold that space for her. You know, it's interesting. I I would say the spirit brings the topics to us, and and grief has come up a lot we we recently heard a woman who trains chaplains at 1 of the hot local hospitals speak. And and she talked about how Christians are kind of the least competent grievers Right? But we we want grief to be fast, and we kind of have this hope in Christ and and it just is and you're supposed to get there really fast. And she talked a lot about sort of the Jewish practices around Shiva, which is a whole year before you, really are expected to not be sort of deep in the grief process and just struck me how we've always been so quick to to want grieving to be over, and I love that you're making space for for someone in that in that particular moment. Wendy Anderson Schulz: I think in other times in the church in church history, we have been better at it than we are now. I think our sort of American quickness, as you said, tied with, you know, just some avoidance of of these darker, harder places has definitely led us to this church culture of, you know, now we I was talking one about grieving the other day. And she said, we can't even call a funeral funeral anymore. It has to be a celebration of life, which is a beautiful sentiment, but And also... Right. we can we can grieve deeply and lament in community and and enter into lament and grief with, you know, our friends and our family as they experience it. because it is the only universal experience as humans. You know, while all of us will have children, not everyone will be married, not everybody will have a fulfilling occupation, we will all have loss. Heidi Kleine: Yeah. It's a powerful thought. Yeah. And I as, you know, going back to the beginning of the conversation where you're talking about COVID, I mean, I still think some of the anger that we are seeing in the world now is unprocessed to grief. One one of my coaches likes to say unmatabilized grief. Yeah. From that whole experience, we we didn't let ourselves really processed through the loss of expectations and sort of the griefs that came with that and the loss of millions of people. Yes. So but there you there's a little bit of a a segue there when you started talking about church history because Yes, you have also recently taken another leap of faith. And so tell my listeners a little bit about that and about sort of what helped you choose this new season in the midst of this season of launching your passion project Wendy Anderson Schulz: Yeah, so this January, I started a master's of theological studies at Northern Seminary. And that was actually a fruit of our pilgrimage in Italy last year, which is called women of influence. We really look at how are we supposed to be influencing our communities and and God's kingdom. And what came to me is that I needed more education. I need more education to have the influence and impact I want to have. And so I started that program mostly able to do that online and it has been a great journey to just embark on in learning on a deeper level. I'm I'm so nerdy when it comes to, like, church history to I love all of that. And so it has been hard and delightful. to enter into that, enter into a community of learners as well. Okay. And, hopefully, all this one. Heidi Kleine: Well and, you know, this is this is sort of a passion project we share. I'm fascinated by the women in the church and the ways that the patriarchy, the the historic patterns in society have changed how women are treated by the church and inner interacting with the church. So I really like to I love talking to you and learning about new people and new women. And I think often, part of what's holding women back from doing the thing that they feel called to or pursuing that passion project in their life right now is this this sense that we're not supposed to. Right? You said something when we were talking about the potential of living, you're gonna have to remind me. Unyanked my oppressive systems. Talk talk a little bit about that I that the potential you see for women and, in particular, Christian women as we sort of explore the early church and the ways that current social impact and historic social impacts have kind of warped our perspective on our role. Wendy Anderson Schulz: Absolutely. As I mentioned in the beginning, I worked in church based ministry for years years and butted my head against what I felt god was calling me to do, and I knew my giftings, which includes strategy, teaching, leadership, that do not fit into some denominations view of where women are called to serve and how they're gifted. And when I left church based ministry, I left in just very honestly a lot of hurt. and needed to take a season to hear from God instead of society church. people, what they're what what does God think about his daughters? How does he wanna use them in his kingdom? And scripture is full. If we will stop looking at 4 words that we interpret from how Paul might have said something in one of his letters to do a specific church, and instead of look at the canon of scripture, what is God always done with women? Yeah, right. Female profits all through the old testament. We have women of influence all through the new test men and all through Paul's writing AM Ministry. He was actually very complementary of women in his ministry and women who were hosting house churches who were delivering letters, who were imprisoned with him, who were spreading the gospel, who were funding his ministry. we actually look at the canon of Scripture. It is unmistakable that it is God's desire to use his image bearing to daughters in the work that he has going on there. And so the more we can learn, I think the more we're empowered is the very opposite of I think sometimes women can be we can be scared to look like what does God really think about me? Or what was really going on in the early church? because we're afraid we'll be disappointed that women were excluded or God didn't want us there, but if we actually look, women are everywhere and they're everywhere in power they're everywhere in influence. My favorite thing that we do on our Italy pilgrimage is that we go to church after church after church that were owned by women land that on their, you know, in their homes, they were gathering believers to hear the gospel, to be baptized long before the Roman Empire made Christianity legal and they left their homes for the purpose of having churches. And those churches still stand. You can go into, you know, Saint Cecilia's in Rome and go underground into an excavated area that was her home. And this is a space that for 1800 years this one woman's home has been used as a church and it still is today. I mean, when you step into those stories, the quibbles we hear today of, you know, women can do this but not this. God wants women to do this but not this. His They really fade away. Heidi Kleine: No. Well, I have to be honest, I I'm determined some night day. I'm going with you on one of these trips because I wanna have that experience. I I felt it a little bit in Spain in Teresa's Cathedral. And in particular, in sort of the underground areas, just this this sense of here was this woman who was, you know, arguing that the church needed to look different. Like, like, I don't wanna be up in that, you know, ornate space. This is my down here. I wanna go out and take care of people and and so much that message. And I had never heard the story before we happened upon this tour when we were traveling with my my daughter and just opened up a perspective that I think is exciting. and I love what you're doing. I think it's really cool. Wendy Anderson Schulz: Thank you. Heidi Kleine: So if my readers would like or my listeners would like to learn more about you and about these trips, how do we access that information? Wendy Anderson Schulz: Thanks. I would love to chat with people who are interested. Best places to find me are on Instagram at life on pilgrimage. or on my website, also lifeonpilgrimage.com. And you'll see all sorts of information about our itineraries and where and why we go, the places we go, and you can follow along on Instagram on our journeys. Heidi Kleine: Well, that's very exciting. Before we close, I do wanna go back to one thing that you said in this conversation because you said I needed to take a season, and I love the way that just ties into what I talk about in my coaching practice, which is a season of me, Right? And talking about how a season doesn't have to it doesn't have to be the season you launch your It might be the season you choose rest. It might be the season. I I love how your story talks about a season of learning a season of learning the business things, a season of learning the his biblical history things, right, like these different aspects and the way that all ties into sort of taking a season and deciding. And I talk all the time about how it's about your intention for that season. it's there's no wrong goal that as long as it's the goal you intended to pursue in that season. So if my listeners are feeling the call, there's a passion project down their heart, like, what is the one piece of advice you would give them. Wendy Anderson Schulz: I'm only glad you mentioned the season of me because I I think having community and support and a little bit of direction like you're offering through that is incredibly valuable. A key piece for me was meeting with a spiritual director who got me, who helped me she didn't need to create a vision for me, but she sat and held the space to for me to process. helped me figure out next step, helped me discern, like, yes. This is my next thing. And so I think when we can find wise community to support us, and not try to go it alone, there's no season of me working toward life on pilgrimage that has been alone. And so I think community wise counsel is such a important thing. Heidi Kleine: Right. Well, I love that, and I love that it kinda ties back to this idea of of a season of me and of pursuing that time. So I am super excited that my my listeners will get to meet you, and And I hope maybe someday, some of them, and you and I will go on one of these trips. Yeah. Beautiful. Just look forward to this connection. And thank you so much for taking your time today to to tell us a little bit about your journey. Thanks for having me. Heidi Kleine: I'm so glad You have found me here on the podcast, and I can't wait to get to know you better. The best way for us to connect is over at my website. heidiclimb.com. From there, you can link to all my socials. You can send me a message. You schedule a con discovery call, a chance for us to chat a little bit about how you fit into the coaching programs that I offer. The other option you have is just shoot me an email. heidi@heideclinedot com. I would love to talk to you about all the different ways that you can be supported in your journey for finding a season of you. I hope you have a great week, and I look forward to seeing you next week. 7/20/2023 Integrity On Your Terms
Greetings, my friends, and welcome to episode three of season three of A Season of Me Stories. This is the episode I'm calling integrity on your terms. I am excited to be back here talking once again about one of those things that keeps popping up in day to day conversations that I'm having. And we've talked about this before. It is my belief that when you start to notice something repetitive in your world, repetitive in your conversations, in your experiences, that's a nudge. To dig a little deeper, look into that, be reminded about what you believe about that thing. And for me, over the past month, in my conversations, in my coaching conversations, we have just encountered several opportunities to ask the question, what can you do to stay in your own integrity in this situation? And I've always said that integrity is one of my highest values.
And so as we start to talk about this, I first of all, just want to encourage you. Have you ever sat down and made a list of the values that are super important to you as a person? I highly encourage you to do it, because once you do that, you start to notice the places where those things come up and where you want to maybe delve a little deeper or invest a little research or a little study or something in. And for me, that's always integrity has been one of those. And as I've been having coaching conversations over the past month, particularly with people who are trying to discern the answer on a decision, some fairly major life decisions, or are discerning about how to have a hard conversation, I found myself repeatedly saying, where's your integrity in this? What do you need to do to stand in your own integrity? And I think it's really important to kind of focus a little bit on that word in your own integrity. Part of having integrity is understanding what you value, what you stand for, what's important to you. And so that kind of then points back to the title that I said, integrity on your terms. Integrity is one of those values that we have to define for ourselves. And so I started out with just like, what's the dictionary definition? What happens if you google define integrity? And integrity came up with two separate definitions that I think are kind of interesting because the first one is that integrity is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. And I think that sounds like integrity to all of us. And the second one is that it's a state of being whole, solid, undivided, right? So we use integrity when we talk about the integrity of a structure, like the integrity of a building. Can it withstand the environment that it's in? Can it stay solid? And I think both of those definitions actually work when we talk about what integrity is for us. But when you talk about something as kind of open ended, to a certain extent as moral principles. Then you start to talk about what do you define as your moral principles? What are moral principles to you? As I was kind of thinking about all this, I was also thinking about a workshop that I just had. I called it time on your terms. And I was talking with the people who came to this workshop about how you can't really waste time unless you choose to waste time. And kind of what I meant by that is, it's not a matter of what you're doing with your time, but it's a matter of what you intend to do with your time. So this whole thing came up with my daughter and I one day when she came home from something, and, you know, I wasted a bunch of time today. I spent too much time on Netflix, and I didn't get what I wanted to do done. And she said to me, Well, mom, if you needed some downtime, if you needed some rest, it's not wasted time. She's like, don't beat yourself up about wasted time just because you rested. And I found myself thinking about that because I hadn't actually rested, because the whole time that I was distracting myself with Netflix, I wasn't fully present and enjoying the rest. I was thinking about the things that I had wanted to get accomplished. And so it's true that watching Netflix wasn't a waste of time. It wouldn't have been a waste of time if I had intended to do that, but it was a waste of time because I hadn't. And I therefore hadn't gotten the rest that I might have gotten out of using that time. And so that sort of tied back to me, to this idea of integrity, right? Making integrity about our choices. And if you think that whole workshop sounds interesting, I will be running it again later in August. So make sure that you are connected to me on my newsletter or on my social media. So you hear about when we're going to redo that workshop. But anyway, all of that made me go back to my bookshelf. We've talked about this before that if I am dealing with something, I often buy a book to address this topic. And I have a book called Integrity, and I knew I had purchased it years ago, went and I dug it out. And this is a book by Dr. Henry Cloud. Some of you may know him as The Boundaries Guy, published back in 2006, and it's called Integrity the Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality. And this book really focuses on business, but there are six sort of principles that I think fit our conversation about what integrity means, what integrity means to me. And then I think what's really important is what integrity means to you in your relationship with yourself. And so the six characteristics and again, this is coming from a business perspective, people who had integrity were able to successfully gain the trust of the people they were leading and capture their full hearts and followings. That's a solid definition of connecting with your people, gaining trust. And I would argue you also need to have trust in yourself when you're having integrity, right? So when you need to make a decision or you need to have a hard conversation, starting with the place of already having established sort of trust and connection with the people around you having a team in place, whether it's your friends, your family, your coworkers. Knowing that you have some people around you that support you in your decisions and understand your heart is an important first step. The second point that he brings out is to see all the realities that are right in front of them. We all have blind spots. Sometimes those blind spots are about ourselves, sometimes they are historic. Being aware and being honest with ourselves about what those are and kind of seeking advice and making sure we're being realistic about the things we are asking not only of others, but also of ourselves, right? And so I go back to some of the conversations that we've had about setting goals. And when you're beating yourself up, is it for something that you realistically could have done better? Or did you really need to just admit that this wasn't the right time for that or you asked yourself for more than you had to offer? The third point he talks about is that people with integrity work in a way that produces outcomes. And again, I go back to for our purposes, for this Season of you, that we are talking about being clear on what the outcomes that you want are and then doing the things that will point to those outcomes are how you have integrity and how you have integrity with yourself. Like I said before, committing to a season of Me is about saying for this little gap of time, the priority for me is going to be this thing. Whether it is writing your book or getting healthier or whatever it is you are choosing to launch or put out into the world. Deciding that it can be a priority for a certain time is dealing with integrity. The fourth point that he said is dealing with people obstacles, failures, losses, being, again, realistic and honest about them. And I go back to some of these conversations that I've been having in coaching and asking the clients that are facing some of these hard decisions, what does it look like for you to stand in integrity on the other side of this conversation? Right? And part of that is being honest about the thoughts that are coming to you about these people, about the motivations that they have and deciding how best to approach sort of the negative, the influences in the situation that may or may not be to your benefit and deciding what does it look like for you on the other side to stand in your own integrity once that decision has been made, once that conversation has been had, what does it look like for you to feel like you are standing in integrity? The fifth one is focusing on growth and again, growth for yourself and growth for the people around you. Does this decision that you're making or does this choice you need to pursue lead everyone to a better place? And does it lead you to a better place? Does it leave you closer to that thing that you believe you are called to do? And if it does, then how do you have any option but to pursue it but to act on it? And that kind of like leads up to the last point, which is that leaders with integrity transcend their own interests and give themselves to a larger purpose. And so part of what I want to focus on in that is in this Season of Me, if you are feeling called to something and you are not acting on that call, then you're missing out on all the benefits for yourself. But you also are denying the people that you are called to interact with, the people that you are called to serve the opportunity to have that experience. And so to stand in integrity in a Season of Me is to trust yourself, to know what the next right thing is, to have the courage to kind of step out in that definition. And then also, just to be clear on what that definition is, in this current climate that we live in, sometimes it's a little bit hard to tell what are the principles that matter to you, what are the values that matter to you, how are you being called into the world? And where are you going to make the biggest difference? And sometimes the places that you hear you need to go aren't easy. Sometimes you will disappoint some people because you're choosing a path that's different than they might have envisioned for you. Sometimes you are having to confront things that one person looks at and says is the reality and you look at it differently. But unless you can articulate that, you risk your own integrity in the process. Right? So kind of as we look forward to this next stress. As you are trying to decide what a season of me looks like for you, the very first thing you need to do is decide what your values are, what matters most to you, for what you are going to put out in the world. What is integrity on your terms? And then start to look at the times that you question that, like the times that you are wondering if a decision, if an action actually is right for you, thinking about what you have set as a bar for yourself in your own values before you take action, but also questioning sometimes where that hesitancy comes from, right? Is your hesitancy coming from a rule or a norm that you want to uphold? Is it people pleasing voices coming into the back of your head that says you're supposed to keep everybody happy, which honestly, you can't do and stay in integrity? Is it some of those overthinking voices coming into your head that are asking more you to consider more than you actually need to to make the decisions? What does it look like to be clear about what integrity means to you on your terms? And I encourage you to spend a little time with this because if you do, it will help you make those decisions. It'll help you have those hard conversations, because once you know what you stand for, it is much easier to keep yourself intact. When the things that come at you that make it hard to feel whole, to feel like you are in your integrity, knowing how you want to respond to them and sort of being prepared for that is a great place to start now. It's not always going to be things that you can control. I don't want to minimize the challenges that some of you face in this world. We all have different levels of privilege and different levels of flexibility to make some of these choices. Sometimes the things that are happening to us and around us are out of our control. So I don't want to imply that you will always have the outcomes you want, but you can always choose to stand in your own integrity, which is going back to integrity on your terms. What's that mean for you? And have you really thought about what you value in this world? And as you look at a season of you and as you think about that calling that's been placed on your heart, what does it look like to stand in integrity regarding that next right step for you? As always, I look forward to connecting you and hearing like, what has this conversation brought up in you? What are you looking forward to as you evaluate for yourself? What are your core values and what does it mean? What is on your terms? I look forward to talking to you. Next week, we will go back to our interview series with meeting another person who has launched a business out in the world. I'm excited to introduce you to her. Bye. 7/11/2023 July for JoyOn this episode of A Season of Me Stories, join your host Heidi Kleine as she kicks off Season 3 with an episode titled 'July for Joy'. Heidi dives into the power of spreading joy and how it enhances our experiences. She discusses the distinction between joy and happiness, emphasizing that joy is a state of being that embraces peace and contentment, while happiness is more temporary and reactive. . In this episode, Heidi introduces the summer series of the Me Stories podcast, starting off with her favorite month of the year, July. She shares her annual habits and practices that bring her joy during this month, encouraging listeners to create their own customized joy list. She sees July as a halfway point in the year, offering an opportunity for reflection, reset, and intentional joy-seeking. Heidi delves into different definitions of joy, discussing its connection to well-being and the importance of intention. She encourages listeners to keep a joy journal where they can record moments of joy each day, both planned activities and unexpected events. Join Heidi on this insightful journey as she guides you towards intentional joy-seeking in the month of July. Episode Transcript: Greetings my friends and welcome back to a season of Me Stories. This is the first episode of season three. Season three is our summer series and this episode I am calling July for Joy. So for those of you who have been around for a little while and have known me for a while, you know that July is my favorite month of the year. And I frequently call this month July for joy for a bunch of reasons. And we're going to talk about that, not the least of which is that July is my birthday month. And I like to celebrate for the entire month every year and have a lot of different things that are sort of annual habits, annual practices that I practice during the month of July. And I think July is a really cool month. Well, cool from not a weather standpoint. But what I love about July is this sort of halfway reality, right? We are six months into 2023. We are halfway through the year. This is a chance to reset and kind of reset in a bit of a gradual way. When January rolls around, there's all this sort of momentum and pressure to get going and to start the year off strong. And July is this lazy days of summer, kind of midpoint in the year, opportunity to spend the whole month kind of reflecting on how has the year gone, how might you like the year to look different next year? Just like to use this month to be very intentional about joy. And so as we kind of embark on this conversation, I thought I would look up a little bit about joy to see what the definers out there had to say about it. And I found several different interesting definitions. According to Webster's, joy is a feeling of great pleasure or happiness that comes from success, good fortune or a sense of well being or by the prospect of possessing what one desires. And I thought that was interesting. Another definition that came up was great delight caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying. And then we can even use joy as a noun when we talk about something be a joy, it's something or someone that is greatly valued or appreciated. So when I hear those definitions about of joy and the way that they're sort of tied to this sense of well being and sense of delight, what I find interesting about that in the context of what we talk about here all the time is that there's a sense of intention about it, right? It's a sense of looking for joy and valuing joy. And one of the articles that I looked up was talking about the difference between joy and happiness. And I thought this was great, this was from compassion.com. And they have a list of things that I just want to unpack with you. The first one is that joy is a little word and happiness is a bigger word and I thought that was an interesting place for them to start. There's a simplicity about joy, there's a peace about joy, whereas happiness is sort of bigger and bolder, just like the word. The second point they can give is that joy is in the heart and happiness is on the face. I'm not sure I completely agree with that. I believe that joy can show on your face also, but it doesn't work the other way around. Right? Sometimes joy is in your heart even when happiness is not on your face. And we're going to talk about that a little bit. Their next point is that joy is of the soul, but happiness is of the moment. And that one really spoke to me, right? Sort of joy is almost a state of being. Joy transcends and happiness reacts. Joy embraces peace and contentment waiting to be discovered. And this is one I really want to highlight. The waiting to be discovered point, right? That when we are in a state of joy, we are at peace, we are content, but we're also noticing and we're going to talk about that a little bit when we get into the steps of pursuing a sense of joy in your life. The next bullet point says that joy runs deep, it overflows while happiness hugs. Hello. Right? Such an interesting visualization, right? To this sense of depth that goes with joy. The next one is that joy is a practice and a behavior. It's deliberate and intentional. Happiness comes and goes, blithely along its way. And I love this. Again, the idea of joy being a practice, a way of being, and a way that we can intentionally choose to behave. Joy is profound. It's scriptural. Don't worry, rejoice. Happiness is more like a balm don't worry, be happy. Joy is an inner feeling, whereas happiness is the outward expression. And this is something that I just think is so powerful about joy. Joy endures hardship and trials and connects with meaning and purpose. And so that goes back to that comment that joy is deep in your soul and happiness can be on your face. Right? Sometimes we find joy in places that seem hard, but we are able to see the joy in them. And then this last one, a person pursues happiness but chooses joy. Often we have the chance to determine how we want to feel in a circumstance, what we want to believe about a circumstance. And that choice often could be to seek the joy in it, to find the gift. We talk often about looking at where is the gift in the hardship or the gift in the obstacle or the challenge that we're facing. And so I want to challenge you in this month of July to be intentional and to be deliberate about seeking joy. And so how do you do that? The first step is to make a list of things that bring you joy. Maybe it's time with friends. Maybe it's being creative, maybe it's being active or outdoors. Maybe it is finding new places to be, trying new meals. It can even be work oriented tasks. Maybe it's tidying up spaces. Maybe it's connecting with a loved one. The list can go on and on and on. But having the list spelled out and make sure your list has a variety of what should I say commitment levels, right? A variety of time required to experience this thing that brings you joy. So maybe it's visiting a grandchild and that's going to involve a whole weekend trip. Maybe it's writing a letter to a friend or making a phone call or meeting them for coffee, right? There's different levels. Maybe it's spending ten minutes a day meditating. Pick a variety of things that bring you joy and make a list. So write it down somewhere in a journal, in a notebook, but somewhere where you can access it. Because step two is being intentional every day to ask yourself, did I intentionally do something on my joy list today? Right? So whether it's in the morning and you are deciding to pick something out, or it's in the evening, when you're reflecting back on your day, make sure that you've done something off your joy list on a daily basis for this month. And so that brings me up to the next step. Number three is during the month of July, I want to challenge you to keep a joy journal, kind of like gratitude journals that we use and practice. Find a place or in a time of day where you are going to take note of the things that brought you joy in a given day. Maybe they are things you set out and intended to do specifically because you knew they would bring you joy, but also want you to take note of the places that joy surprises you. The events and the activities that happen that bring you joy that maybe you hadn't thought of when you first were making out your list. And I talk about noticing, right? You say this all the time. When you start thinking about something. You buy a new car, say you buy a new white Prius and all of a sudden everywhere you look, there are white PRI on the road. I've always wondered how you would actually make a plural out of Prius. But anyway, all that aside, you suddenly see them everywhere, right? Or the noticing that happens because you've planted the intention of noticing. So in your joy journal, keep a list of where did you see joy, where did you find joy, where did you notice joy? And maybe you find something that you want to move over and add to your joy list so you have something to refer back to in future times when you are looking for joy in your life. Again, going back to this idea that joy is intentional and that it's a practice, right? By keeping a journal and by pursuing and choosing to be joyful or to find joy, it can make a big difference. And the third and final step is to be intentional about spreading joy. Right. Joy gets reflected back to you. When you are putting joy out into the world and being joyful about the way that you interact with people, you will find that joy gets reflected back to you in a way that just compounds your experience. So the last step in our July for Joy process is to be intentional about spreading joy. So this is the end of our first episode. Next week, I'm really excited to be bringing you our first of the summer interview series. We're going to be talking to Cary Heisey, who's the founder of an organization called Designed for Joy, and I can't wait to introduce you to her and to this organization because it brings me great joy to be connected to them. I hope you have a great week, and I can't wait to hear where you found joy this week. Bye. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. Archives
July 2023
Categories |
Contact
heidi@heidikleine.com
919-386-9181 10030 Green Level Church Road Suite 802 # 109 Make a Payment |
Blog |
Menu |
7/27/2023
0 Comments